From ABC’s Good Morning America (09/05/10): Tips on how to have the wedding of your dreams on a budget.

Few can argue that Facebook, Twitter and Foursquare has caused some people that may have, otherwise, lived a rather obscure life, to become more than a bit fanatical about making sure that the world knows of their every move. So, it should come as no real shock that these same social networking sites might cause an overly eager friend to “spill the beans” about a couple’s engagement on Facebook or Twitter before they’ve told their families. And, what about the guest that uses these same social networking sites to post status updates with real time, play-by-play, wedding commentary (the good & the not so complimentary) of everything from the Bride and Groom’s choices of attire, food and decor, complete with photographs, before the party has even begun?

Some newlyweds may be giddy knowing that anyone paying attention on the worldwide web can become a “virtual,” albeit uninvited guest at their wedding. It sounds fun, especially since these individuals (some strangers) won’t have to be fed or included in the bar tab!

Others, however, may be more than slightly aggravated that their special day has suddenly become the less than personal and intimate affair they had dreamed about.     

If you’re one of those couples that doesn’t want your family and friends instantaneously posting your wedding details to their Facebook wall and Twitter newsfeeds, the editors at WeddingChannel.com have put together a “Top Five Digital Wedding Guest Don’ts”.  Let your guests in on your wish to not turn your wedding into instant fodder for discussion or, worse yet, criticism by posting this guest guide to your (this part is so hard to write with a straight face) Facebook page, your wedding web site, your blog and/or Twitter newsfeed.   

 “DON’T GIVE A WEDDING DAY PLAY-BY-PLAY.

“Just checked into John and Jane’s wedding.” “Bride walking down the aisle now.” It may be hard to resist, but sharing minute-by-minute details about someone else’s wedding on Facebook, Twitter or foursquare is not okay. Let the bride check-in to her own wedding if she wants. And when it comes to the engagement — make sure you ask the bride whether the happy news is public yet — she might’ve only told a few friends so far and probably won’t appreciate you sharing her engagement news on Facebook instead of her. 

DON’T BE THE PAPARAZZI.

Just because you post what you eat every day on Flickr, doesn’t mean the bride wants her bachelorette party, bridal shower and wedding seen by the world. According to a WeddingChannel.com poll, 40% of brides said posting photos online without permission or even a heads-up was their biggest digital wedding gripe. So ask before posting wedding-related photos and videos, and don’t even think about posting unflattering wedding pictures and risqué bachelorette party videos. 

DON’T RSVP VIA TWEET.

Unless the bride said “RSVP on Twitter,” chances are she wants you to RSVP via mail. Not to mention, posting on your friend’s Facebook wall may trigger drama. Who knows who the bride didn’t invite! 

DON’T COMPLAIN ONLINE.

Bride’s being a bridezilla? Hate your bridesmaid dress? If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t post it online-because chances are it will spread like viral fire, and you don’t want the bride to find out. Or do you? 

DON’T FORGET THE GIFT.

In this digital age, it doesn’t take that much effort to go online and buy a gift—especially when you can easily find a couple’s registry just by entering the bride’s name on WeddingChannel.com. ”

Don’t be a wedding tweet twit. Give your fingers, friends, fans and followers a much deserved rest. The Bride & Groom will appreciate your consideration and undivided attention.

“Groomology” is a book every Groom should not only read, but keep with him as a reference throughout the wedding planning process. It’s an entertaining look at serious ways Grooms-to-be can be active participants in the planning while helping their Brides-to-be avoid so much unneeded stress.  

As a guide to “what every (smart) Groom needs to know before the wedding,” it’s filled with extremely helpful and useful information. Plus, did I mention, it’s entertaining!

Like the Grooms that have borrowed the book from me, most engaged guys will enjoy the rather quick read. One of its unique selling points is that it is written from another guy’s perspective. You won’t be hearing Martha Stewart or any other so-called, female wedding expert in your head as you get into the meat of information that is sure to win you accolades from your Bride for years to come. 

The author, Michael Essany,was the host of  “The Michael Essany Show” on E! Entertainment Television. As a recent groom himself, Essany saw the need for an intelligent guide that would help the couple plan their wedding together.

“Groomology” Contents:

Let “Groomology” show you how becoming a partner in the wedding process can make the whole event more enjoyable, meaningful, and memorable. Time and time again, soon-to-be husbands only tackle what the bride-to-be has told them to do. “Groomology” outlines these traditional Groom’s duties but goes a step further to instruct Grooms in the art of getting involved.

Grooms Will Learn The Best Strategies For A Happy Bride Including: Being Sensitive To the Bride’s Needs and Worries. Taking Over Tasks the Bride Doesn’t Want. Understanding How Much Work Goes Into It All. Reducing Her Stress. Giving an Opinion. Letting Go of an Opinion. Being Creative. The One Thing He Needs to Do…(More “Groomology” contents). 

For more information about “Groomology,” including excerpts from the book, visit the listing on Amazon. Then…buy the book! You AND your Bride will be glad you did!

The Overland Park Marriott
Proudly Presents:

An Entertaining Workshop For Every Bride & Groom!

Please Attend As Our Guest:
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
from
6:00pm-8:00pm

At the
Overland Park Marriott (Map)
Grand Pavilion

Admission: FREE

You and your guests will have the opportunity to meet Ron Ruth, owner of Ron Ruth Wedding Entertainment and one of the most sought after Wedding Entertainment Directors™ in the Midwest.

Ron will share his helpful tips, creative ideas and insider’s secrets of using…

to design and create an extraordinarily fun wedding celebration
that your family and friends will rave about for years to come.

To RSVP please contact Christina Cook, Catering Sales Executive, at 913.338.8626
or Christina.Cook@marriott.com.

Come and experience The Overland Park Marriott’s Chef’s culinary delights and discuss your
Wedding Reception, Rehearsal Dinner, Bridal Shower, or Luncheon with a Marriott Certified Wedding Planner. Prepare to be inspired by the striking, contemporary design
that now embodies the Overland Park Marriott.

To RSVP please contact Christina Cook, Catering Sales Executive, at 913.338.8626
or Christina.Cook@marriott.com.

Recently Added: Exciting news from the Mojica Photography blog. Loraine Mojica McCall writes: “I will be there as well, and will give all attendees a free digital portrait after the workshop. Even if you think you’ve already planned everything for your wedding, it will be worth your while, plus you’ll get a free professional portrait for your FB profile.”

Work For A Win-Win Solution

Imagine, you’re a couple planning your wedding, and you’re looking for the perfect wedding professionals that match your style, have great experience and referrals, and are within your budget.

Let’s say you’ve come across a professional that fits the first two criteria and you absolutely LOVE their work. You’re also certain that they can meet your every need and you think they are just the coolest person(s) ever!

Aaaand then they share their fees for their services…and, unfortunately, they are out of your budget. What do you do?

Many Brides and Grooms I speak with will take an “oh well” attitude and move on. They keep searching, but that one perfect, wedding pro keeps popping into their heads. As they shop, they compare all others to that one awesome individual and it becomes increasingly apparent that no on else will do.

So, here’s a thought.

Instead of giving up on your perfect choice and, perhaps, settling on second best, you do have a couple of options! Which option you choose will depend on just how far that vendor is out of your budget.

My first bit of advice is to contact them and explain what it is, specifically, that you love about their service, but don’t be afraid to let them know that you just don’t have quite that much to spend.

If your budget and their pricing are hundreds or maybe thousands of dollars apart, ask for a referral! As a wedding professional, myself, owner of Ron Ruth Wedding Entertainment in Kansas City, MO, I’d always prefer to find a way to work with couples that really want to work with me. But, I can also point you in the direction of someone that has a similar style that you might like just as much, will meet your needs, but is in your price range. And, you can still be confident that they will perform in a professional manner and do a great job.

Another possibility is that the vendor may offer associate services. They may have an assistant or associate that has been trained by them, works in a similar style, but is more affordable.

I have an associate Entertainment Director (her name is Carrie…she’s super awesome…but more about her another day) that has worked many, many wedding receptions with me. Most importantly, I am completely confident in her ability to plan, direct, entertain and exceed expectations at wedding celebrations. There are times that she’s a much better fit for a couple on a tight budget.

You may also find some wedding professionals, like me, that will try to work with your budget! If there is only a small discrepancy between what you have to spend and the fee, let them know what part of their services you love, that you really want to hire them and ask if there’s any room for negotiation. My mama taught me that it never hurts to ask! They may be willing to work with you a bit. But, be prepared to bend your budget a bit for them, too.

Personally, I want nothing more than to assist couples that truly appreciate my work.

Let’s say, regardless of the company, the DJ entertainment package you want is $500 more than what you have budgeted. Depending on the popularity of the date of your wedding, you should not be afraid to ask if there may be a reasonable, “middle ground” that is mutually agreeable. They bend, you bend and you both win. Keep in mind, however, that it is not fair (or nice) to ask any wedding professional to negotiate if you are not willing to make concessions, as well.

Another possibility is to consider the importance of each item you want to include in your wedding reception and the impact (and expense) that those amenities will have on creating lasting memories. In other words, in what areas might you scale back a bit that most of your guests will not really notice, let alone remember?

As an example, I am a DJ that is also a certified, Wedding Entertainment Director. I offer, literally, dozens of creative options. Some can be quite time consuming to prepare for in order to provide a quality performance. How much you may invest in my services depends greatly on all of the options you may want to include in your wedding celebration and the amount of time that must be dedicated to helping you realize your dream. Perhaps you can do without 1 or 2 to make my services more affordable to you.

Important Note: You’ll have a better shot with negotiating if your wedding is during the off season (November – March) or on a day other than Saturday.

One word of caution, Only enter into negotiations if you really, truly LOVE the vendor’s work and you REALLY…REALLY want to hire them for your wedding. If they simply have no room to negotiate, don’t take it personally.  Like you, wedding professionals have budgets they must meet, expenses they must pay and depend on their salaries for their livelihood.

If all else fails, just go back to “Plan A” and ask for that referral! Either way, you’ll benefit.

The original inspiration for this post came from a blog article written by Kristen Kaplan, a member of the Association of Bridal Consultants and owner of Simply Stunning Events in Nashville, TN. I appreciate her permission to borrow from the essence of her article, “Vendor Pricing & Negotiation,” to create this post.

Ron Ruth Wedding Entertainment Presents 10 Tips For Wedding Toasts and Wedding Speeches at Kansas City Wedding Receptions

So, you’ve anxiously agreed to be the Best Man or Maid/Matron of Honor at your best friend’s or relative’s upcoming wedding and you’ve also been assigned the important task of giving a wedding toast or speech at the reception. Writing a good wedding toast is a job that should not to be taken too lightly. The Best Man’s and Maid/Matron of Honor’s wedding speeches are your moment to shine by adding a fun, personal touch to the wedding reception that should create a fond memory.

As someone that performs weekly at Kansas City wedding receptions, I’ve seen and heard a number of wedding toasts and wedding speeches, from very emotional and endearing to funny and extremely creative. Most have been impressive and entertaining in their own special way and, of course, unique to the Bride & Groom.

Some, however, could have been better had the presenter taken a few minutes to research the very basic structure for delivering a good wedding toast or wedding speech.

What follows are 10 tips to help you give Kansas City’s best wedding toast or wedding speech based on years of personal observations.

Tip #1 - Know What You’re Going To Say: Invest in a stack of 3×5  cards and jot down bullet points of the highlights of your wedding speech or toast. Do not write it out in it’s in entirety. A case of nerves can make the temptation to read your speech verbatim too great and that can be extremely tedious for the listener. And, above all, do not fool yourself into believing that you can “wing it.” You’ll not only risk forgetting important things you wish you had said, but “winging it” can also lead to meaningless rambling and, worse yet, saying something you might regret.

Tip #2 - Know Your Audience: Know that you are speaking to the Bride & Groom’s family members and closest friends. Some may be strangers to you.  Although a touch of humor is a great ice breaker and attention grabber, it may be best to steer away from jokes that cross into the sometimes sensitive areas of old boyfriends/girlfriends, embarassing private stories, religion, politics  or sex. When in doubt, pretend YOUR Grandmother is sitting front row center.

Tip #3 - Introduce Yourself: Whenever you speak before a group, it’s always a good idea to introduce yourself and to let the audience know why you’re speaking. 

Tip #4 - Show Appreciation: Thank the host(s) for inviting you and acknowledge those that helped make the Bride & Groom’s wedding day so special.

Tip #5 – Tell How You Know The Newlyweds: Tell how you came to know the Bride and/or Groom and how long you’ve known each other. It’s a great back story and personal touch that the guests are sure to enjoy.

Tip #6 – Share Why The Bride & Groom Are Perfect for Each Other: A Best Man or Maid/Matron of Honor’s wedding toast or wedding speech is an opportunity to celebrate two people that got married, so include an unmistakable trait or interest the couple share in common that will lead them to a happy marriage.

Tip #7 – “Cliff Notes” Can Be Your Friend: At a loss for words? In a pinch, a simple search on Google can help you find the perfect, short line of poetry or famous, romantic love quote from someone that has already said it “best.”  A well selected quote can also inspire you to come up with a few words of your own. 

Tip #8 - Give Advice Sparingly: Some Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honor wedding toasts or wedding speeches offer some sort of advice. If your toast includes advice, stay away from the type of humor mentioned in Tip #2. Keep it light. Words of advice should be given in a manner that will make the Bride and Groom smile.

Tip #9 - Refrain From Overindulging: Drinking alcohol in excess, prior to the Best Man or Maid/Matron of Honor’s speech or wedding toast, will not make this important task any easier or less stressful. It won’t make you funnier, either. Really! At a Kansas City wedding reception, most toasts will take place early in the evening; right after the Bride and Groom have been introduced or immediately after dinner. There will be plenty of time, afterward, to indulge in your favorite adult beverage. Staying sober will assure that you don’t say something that will embarrass you, the Bride & Groom or their guests. Remember, your Grandma is still watching!

Tip #10 - Don’t Forget To Conclude Your Toast: Often times the Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honor will get caught up in the moment of the wedding toast to the Bride and Groom and forget to give their speech an ending that provides the cue for the guests to raise their glasses and drink. Don’t forget to conclude your wedding toast or speech with the obligatory “Please raise your glasses to…” or “Here’s to the…” or the ever essential “Cheers!”

Bonus Tip – Less Is More: Try to keep your wedding toast or speech to 3-5 minutes to avoid guests “tuning out.”  

An excellent resource for wedding toasts and wedding speeches.

It’s easy to research wedding toasts and speeches on-line. A quick Google search will produce a number of sites with wedding toast examples, free wedding toasts, and free Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honor wedding speeches.

If you want to appear as an expert at toasting, you won’t find better or more valuable wedding toast and speech information than what Tom Halibeck provides in his book “Wedding Toasts Made Easy.”  Tom also gives you the added convenience of downloading his book directly to your computer.  If you’ve waited until the last minute to prepare, “Wedding Toasts Made Easy” is your absolute best solution.

Here’s to you and to delivering an unforgettably fun wedding toast! Cheers!

Receive Congratulatory Greetings For Your Wedding From The President Of The United States and The First Lady.

Imagine how exciting it would be, as a Bride & Groom, to receive congratulatory greetings for your wedding from the President of the United States and the First Lady.

Well, you can and it’s FREE as long as the recipients are American citizens and you follow 2, very simple steps.

First, wedding greetings may only be requested after the wedding has taken place. 

Second, a Presidential greeting request must include the following information:

Name of the Bride & Groom

Address of the Bride & Groom

Date (month, day, year) of the wedding

The name, email address and daytime phone number of the individual requesting the greeting.

And, although not mandated as a requirement, sending a copy of the wedding invitation might be a nice gesture. It would also add legitimacy to the request.

Now that you’ve got all of the information put together, you can submit it in one of 2 ways:

Fax: 202-456-2461

Mail: The White House
Attn: Greetings Office
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue NW
Washington, D.C. 20502-0039

As you can probably surmise, my inside sources* tell me that the White House gets a ton of requests for such congratulatory greetings. So, allow several months for it to reach the recipient.

As an FYI, the White House also sends congratulatory notes to citizens that are…

…commemorating the birth of a child.
…celebrating a birthday of 80 years or older
…retiring from the same job of 30 years or more
…celebrating an anniversary of 50 or more years.     

All congratulatory greeting requests, other than those for weddings and child birth, should be sent at least 8-12 weeks in advance of the specific occasion.

You’ve got to admit, regardless of one’s political affiliation, a congratulatory note from the President of the United States and First Lady would make a memorable addition to any scrapbook. And, you don’t have to “crash” a White House party to get it!

*Just kidding. I don’t really have any inside sources.

Enjoy a video montage of just a few couples that have invited us to celebrate their happiness!

Over 1000 couples have counted on us for an unforgettably fun, Kansas City wedding reception! Over 1000 times, we’ve exceeded expectations!

In a previous article comparing the similarities betwen the making of Oscar winning films and creating unforgettably fun Kansas City wedding receptions, it was demonstrated how each follow a 3 act structure that includes a very distinct beginning, middle and end.

Regardless of the genre of movie, an emotional connection is triggered at the very beginning of a film with the first note of the musical score.  Depending on the movie, the opening music or title song might also be considered as the overture.

A horror film will open with a very dark and macabre soundtrack. A comedy, however, will begin with a light, maybe whimsical, tune. Either way, the music you hear sets the tone for what you are about to see. 

A wedding reception is very similar. The music played as the first guests arrive sets a tone for the evening. In many ways, it is the overture that gives them an emotional glimpse at what is to come. That’s not to say that there can’t be transitions along the way. A film score directly reflects what is happening on the screen at any given moment. And, variety in tempo and intensity brings out a number of emotions. That’s why there are also Academy Awards for best original score.

In some cases, couples want their wedding reception to be “classy,” “elegant” and “fun.”  They wish to convey the “classy” and “elegant” as the guests arrive at the reception site and progress into the “fun” throughout the course of the event. Other couples want their guests to make the emotional transition into the “fun” mode from the moment they arrive. These personal preferences can be satisfied with a little thought and consideration given to the opening soundtrack of your wedding reception. 

For those that want to begin with “classy” and “elegant” perhaps some light jazz or contemporary piano would be appropriate in the early hours of the reception. If you would like to gradually build the energy level during dinner, upbeat classic vocals from the likes of Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin and Tony Bennett (to name only a few) can help you make a subtle, yet notable, transition to “fun.” It is best, however, if the first few party songs of the evening continue to build on the “fun” rather than making an abrupt shift in genres so your guests will enjoy an unobtrusive, seemingly natural  increase in intensity.    

If you are that couple that wants their guests to jump into the “fun” from the onset, you might consider music with a funky Motown, R&B flavor that evolves into a dinner time, toe tappin’ walk down memory lane with some of the greatest one hit wonders from the 70’s, 80’s & 90’s. When the party starts, it will be hard for your family and friends to stay in their seats. 

These are just a couple of ideas from what are, quite literally, hundreds of ambient music options. Regardless, the selections you choose to set the emotional tone for your wedding reception should also be an unmistakable reflection of your unique personality and style.            

I’ll make it easy for you to find the right songs for the perfect musical score to your Kansas City wedding reception. I’ll give you hundreds of choices that will help you create an overture that will set the tone you wish to convey and a soundtrack that will emotionally engage your guests during every memorable moment of your event from their arrival and throughout your extraordinary celebration. 

Receive a complimentary list of over 2 dozen, popular wedding reception arrival, cocktail hour and dinner music genres along with a list of performing artists by emailing your request to ron@ronruthweddings.com.

Creating An Academy Award Winning Wedding Ceremony & Reception.

Through Part I and Part II of this article, Brides and Grooms were introduced to the similarities between the production of an Academy Award winning film and the creation of an equally entertaining and memorable Kansas City wedding ceremony and reception. 

In short, everyone involved in a couple’s wedding day activities plays some role from lead actor and actress to supporting cast, extras, audience or technical support.  And we looked at how films utilize the 3 act structure to draw the audience into a story, convey a plot line filled with distinct moments that they will find interesting and intriguing as it builds in intensity towards an emotional, memorable conclusion. 

To appreciate the comparison between a blockbuster film and a wedding, simply think back to the last great movie you saw and remember how excited you were to tell your friends about it the next day. Did you act out various parts while you described the story? Did you share those moments that scared the heck out of you, made you laugh out loud or brought a tear to your eye? How happy were you when your friends had finally seen the movie and, at last, you were able to share your feelings about the ending, hoping there will be a sequel while confidently proclaiming that it was the best movie ever made? 

Now, just for the fun of it, think back to the last wedding reception you attended. What memories  did you enthusiastically share with your friends the next day? Did you tell them how exciting it was when the wedding party and Bride and Groom were introduced? Did you share the romance and sense of awe you experienced during the newlywed’s first dance or how touched you were when the Bride danced with her father? Did you talk about the incredible fun you had and about all of the wonderful moments that took place that you had never experienced at a wedding reception, but were an undeniable reflection of everything you had come to know about the Bride and Groom? Did you share how disappointed you were that the evening had to end and how you hope to be invited to another wedding reception that is just as much fun? Do you still remember it as the best wedding reception…ever?        

In all likelihood, few people will ever talk about a wedding reception in the manner described above. Why? Because even though those moments may have occured, they weren’t presented in a manner that made anyone want to pay attention. The good news is, there are creative ways to ensure that guests are solely focused on what is important, the Bride and Groom and their celebration! 

There’s no reason why a wedding can’t be just as exciting, engaging and memorable to guests as an Academy Award winning film is to an audience. I’ve been involved in more than a few of those kinds of celebrations. All it takes is a little imagination, a willingness to create an extraordinary celebration and an appreciation for the entertainment process that talented experts of the big screen have been practicing for over a hundred years. 

Take the definitions of the 3 act structure for films and translate it into a wedding reception. 

Act 1 is still the “set-up” and begins the moment guests arrive. It’s where the Bride and Groom’s “story” or event opens and the guests are introduced to the characters, situations, backdrop, locale, etc. It is where interest is created and where the guests will discover the basis of the storyline provided and ponder where it may take them. What takes place in Act 1 acts as the “hook” or the reason for the guests to genuinely care and try to anticipate what excitement lies ahead rather than looking for excuses to leave early. 

Act 2 is of greater importance and the very foundation of the celebration. It is at that point where the guests should feel intrigued and where they are fed more and more entertaining information that leads to  a higher level of interest and encourages their imagination, for at least a few minutes, to push the outside world aside. For a wedding celebration, this act presents the core moments and where guests are invited to participate on a number of emotional levels and the love, romance and joy of the formalities play out.

Act 3 is of greatest importance. Here is where a wedding reception comes to a climax and hands the guests the pay-off they’ve been anticipating…the opportunity to party with the newlyweds and dance the night away! The inventive tools used to create the essential moments are what entice the breathtaking, jaw dropping, happy sensations that seamlessly guide family and friends to a plausible, memorable and all too soon finale.  

Over time I’ll fill in some of the blanks that will bring couples closer to producing an award worthy wedding celebration. I’ll provide a number of imaginative and innovative ideas to help Brides & Grooms create their “hook,” develop a storyline that engages the guests and produce a foundation for a wedding celebration that will take home the honors in all categories! 

In the meantime, enjoy the 82nd annual Academy Awards on Sunday, March 14th, 2010. I hope your favorite movie wins!

Suggested reading: “The Best Wedding Reception…Ever!” by Peter Merry. Your guide to creating an unforgettably fun wedding reception and available at amazon.com.